5 in the bed & this Mammy said, I'm tired, I'm tired!!

Five in the bed and this Mammy said, I’m tired!!! The invasion of small people into our bed at night has been happening for so long now that I’m almost immune to it. Almost.

Usually a baby crying around 12, means he is the first to join us.  That’s ok. We’ll tag team on who gets up to bring him in, usually he calls for his Daddy, and who am I to argue? He comes into bed, has a drink of water, a snuggle and he usually settles straight to sleep.  Next come the patter of four-year old feet, usually after a bad dream or sometimes just because she’s feeling a little lonely and wants the comfort and reassurance of her parents.  She’ll give hugs and kisses, until eventually settling to sleep, her body twisted around one of ours.

Somewhere between 6 and 7am, the oldest Joyce will arrive, bounding in, full of 7-year old energy, ready to start the day with a family hug.  Mostly he’s greeted with a collective groan from the four prone entangled bodies that constitute the remainder of said family but it doesn’t deter him.

Our super king sized bed, that once felt like such a luxury, has become a necessity, and long may it last.  Someday, there won’t be any little feet making their way to me in the dark.  Small hands won’t reach for the safety of my arms.  I won’t smile as a warm breath is breathed onto my cheek.  I know the days pass quickly and my children will be grown and before too long I’ll be lying in this very bed worrying about where they are and who they are with.  My Mammy heart will long for these precious nights that we share now.

A recent South African study by paediatrician Dr Nils Bergman suggests that bed sharing or co-sleeping as it is more commonly called, is beneficial for the health of the baby’s heart, the quality of sleep and for parent-child bonding. I breastfed all three of my babies, so for me co-sleeping was the easy option.  Compared with sitting up at night, in the cold, trying to settle a hungry baby in their own room, snuggling and dozing in my own bed, while baby fed was always going to win.

Wherever baby sleeps, safety protocols apply. Surfaces should be firm. Bedding should be tight fitting to the mattress, which in turn should be tight fitting to the headboard.  Pillows, stuffed animals or blankets should not be near baby’s face.

There should be no space where a baby could roll and become trapped.  Babies should never sleep on a couch or other surface where there is a risk of becoming wedged between cushions.  Babies shouldn’t bed share with an adult who smokes, who has been drinking or taken medication, including over the counter medications.

Premature or low birth-weight babies appear to benefit greatly from co-sleeping nearby, but on a separate surface such as a dedicated co-sleeper attached to the side of the parental bed.  For us, knowing how to safely share our bed with our children has enriched family life hugely.